It's late. I'm tired but I can't sleep. I feel sort of hollow, sort of like I'm made of glass or some kind of vibrating metal. Not that that's bad; maybe I'm more honest now. I've been going from item to item, thing to thing, just trying to get by. The end of the month will let me know if I've been bullshitting myself, which is what I feel is so. I wish I could feel something about it, but if I stop to feel, I think I'll fall over. So I vibrate and ring. What to give thanks for? I'm not sure now, and please, no platitudes or cliches, or I'll give thanks less. Maybe we should use the word "blame" to mean the opposite of "thank." For those we feel grateful to we say "thank you;" maybe those feel ungrateful to we should say, "blame you very much!" Perhaps a sub-language which would allow us to give form to all our evil notions, form like cloth, like an evil velvet that feels really good but is just too impractical to wear for long. Maybe we should take some words and purposely strip them of any subtle meanings. Have some way of belittling people who "oversubtle" their words. Let's see what language we get then.
Maybe I'm just tired and without any ...thing at all, and should just stay sleepin'.